Housework Can't Kill You But Why Take The Chance?

Still in the midst of home renovation mayhem with everything (including my good self) covered in a fog of dust. Instinct tells you to permanently flick your duster which, although completely pointless, takes your mind off the carnage surrounding you.

Anyway, onto happier things and a little theraputic challenge over on Let's Craft and Create which is to use buttons. My entry is a little baby shower guest book which I was asked to make to try to match existing stationery.

I made the digital paper and the baby face is from Cricut's Doodlecharms cartridge. It's meant to look like a little baby tucked up in bed - not sure if I achieved that but it was quite a good match for the shower theme.

I'm also entering it into:

Creative Moments - Anything but a card
Digi Makeover Challenge - Sparkle
House of Gilli - Anything Goes
Love to Create - Anything Goes
Make it Monday - always Anything Goes

That's all for now folks - dusting beckons and a weekend of brushing and mopping - but most importantly a couple of days free of 'workies' wandering in and out of the house.

Thanks for looking and have a great weekend.

Glamping

Can you believe it?   I haven't posted for nine whole weeks!  The reason for being AWOL is that we are having an extension built so I'm mega stressed, can't find a thing and permanently covered in dust.  Nine whole weeks without entering my favourite LIM challenge - I need therapy.  Given the current turmoil I must confess that the card I'm entering this week was made quite a while ago and has sat waiting for the opportunity to be entered into an appropriate challenge.

So without further ado here it is:

My entry might be a bit tenuous but my tent is 'glamourous' in my opinion and the pearls are 'glitzy' so I hope I'll be OK. The tent image is from The Alley Way and the papers are from Pink Petticoat.

And finally here is a little something to help cheer my current situation:

Four surgeons are discussing who makes the best type of surgery patient.

The first surgeon says, "I like to see accountants on my operating table,
because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered."

The second responds, "Yeah, but you should try electricians! Everything inside them is colour coded."

The third surgeon says, "No, I really think librarians are the best; everything inside them is in alphabetical order."

The fourth surgeon chimes in: "You know, I like builders ~
they seem to understand when you have a few parts left over at the end and when
the job takes longer than you said it would."

Thanks for looking and have a great weekend!

A You're Adorable...

This week the challenge over on LIM is one of my favourites - to combine any three past challenges.

I've chosen:

Week 20 Monogram
Week 25 Button or Ribbon
Week 54 Stripes

This card is for my mum's birthday. The story behind it is that she used to sing this song to my sister and I when we were little girls.  Unfortunately I have one of these minds where some things just stick in my head refusing to go away which then drives me to distraction. So don't say I'm not good to you - I like to share and share alike - the whole annoying song goes like this:

A you're adorable
B you’re so beautiful
C you’re a cutie full of charm
D you’re a darling
and E you’re exciting
and F you’re a feather in my arm
G you’re so good to me
H you’re so heavenly
I you‘re the one I idolise
J we’re like Jack and Jill
K you’re so kissable
L is the love light in your eyes
M N O, P I could go on all day
Q, R, S, T alphabetically speaking you’re OK
U made my life complete
V you’re so very sweet
W, X, Y, Z I love to wander through
the alphabet with you
to tell you what you mean to me.

And to help you with the tune:



Guaranteed this little ditty will be in your head for the rest of the day - sorry!  Another example of my overactive brain activity was when Robin Gibb died. I went to bed dog tired but didn't get to sleep until about 05.00 because I had Night Fever playing on a continuous loop in my head - no joke when you're already suffering from night sweats (or power surges as I like to call them) and insomnia.

Thanks for looking and have a great weekend.

BOGOF!

Hello peeps! I've been missing in action for a couple of weeks there's a lot going on right now plus I've had a stinker of a cold. Never mind I'm keeping those good folks at Kleenex in a job - although the red shnozz and hacking cough is so not a good look. So without further ado here is my LIM entry this week for the one layer 'foliage' challenge.

I've used a Bugaboo stamp which you can get from here and the sentiment is computer generated.

And finally a little funny:

There was a woman who was pregnant with twins. Shortly before they were due she had an accident and went into a coma. Her husband was away on business and unable to be reached. While in the coma she gave birth to her twins and the only person around to name her children was her brother.

When the mother came out of her coma to find she had given birth and that her brother had named the twins she became very worried because he wasn't a very bright guy. She was sure he had named them something absurd or stupid.

When she saw her brother she asked him about the twins.

He said, "The first one was a girl."

The mum: "What did you name her?!?"

Brother: "Denise!"

The mum: "Oh, wow, that's not bad! What about the second one?"

Brother: "The second one was a boy."

The mum: "Oh, and what did you name him?"

Brother: "Denephew."

Thanks for looking and have a great weekend!

Housework Can't Kill You...

Just a quick post today as I've lots to do - not anything constructive like housework mainly reconstructive i.e. beautifying myself for a night out tonight - as you get older it takes longer and longer don't you think? It's really just the makeup which is holding my face together!!! So for my LIM 3,2,1 challenge entry this week I'm sharing this card:

As you can see there are 3 colours, 2 letters and one ribbon. The letters and pink heart were cut using my Cricut and for the embossed lines I used my Scor-pal.

Before I go today I'd like to share a few of the late Phyllis Diller's one liners. She died this week and I remember she fascinated me when I was little even though I probably didn't understand her humour (or I had a very mature wit for my young years!) It was probably her outrageous  wigs, costumes and her equally outrageous laugh which appealed to me. Anyway here we go:

o Housework can't kill you, but why take a chance?
o I want my children to have all the things I couldn't afford. Then I want to move in with them.
o Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age - as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight.
o Always be nice to your children because they are the ones who will choose your rest home.
o The reason women don't play football is because 11 of them would never wear the same outfit in public.
o Tranquilisers work only if you follow the advice on the bottle - keep away from children.
o Best way to get rid of kitchen odours: eat out.
o It's a good thing that beauty is only skin deep, or I'd be rotten to the core.
o You know you're old if they have discontinued your blood type.
o Most children threaten at times to run away from home. This is the only thing that keeps some parents going.
o Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.
o Old age is when the liver spots show through your gloves.
o What I don't like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day.
o A smile is a curve that sets everything straight.

Thanks for looking and have a great weekend!

You're Having A Giraffe...

Just a quick entry for the Let's Craft and Create challenge which is 'Stamp It' be it traditional or digi stamping.


I've used a Papercraft Inspirations image which I've paper pieced using Pink Petticoat Pistachio random dots papers from the Lola Rose collection.

I've also created a simple decoupage of the image and added some googly eyes.

I'm also entering the following challenges:

Bearly Mine - Anything Goes
Oldie But Goodie Challenge - Paper Piecing (Lola Rose Papers are over 6 months old)
Lollipop Crafts - Anything Goes
Make it Monday - Anything Goes
Paper Playtime - Polka Dots PLUS Sentiment

Thanks for looking and have a good day!

Cheeky LIM Entry

The LIM challenge today is blue and green. I love this colour combination and will maybe have a couple of goes at the challenge this week.

The image is from Pink Petticoat Cheekies collection and the sentiment has been computer generated.

It's dry and fairly sunny here today (for a change) so I might give the garden a bit of a tidy up before going to see the new Pixar movie Brave tonight. The trailers look fabulous - I hope I won't be disappointed.

I love Merida already - all that red curly hair - she reminds me of my cousin who as a teenager hated her long red curly locks so much she used to iron it between sheets of brown paper to try to straighten it!

And finally...

Q: How do you know when a redhead has been using a computer?
A: There’s a hammer embedded in the monitor

Thanks for looking and have a great weekend!

My New Profession...

...this card is for Rebecca Adlington with some sage words of advice. Genius eh? I'll be setting up my Virtual Life Coach Therapy Centre very very soon so if you have anything you need help with just ask!!!

The card is really for my favourite LIM challenge which is a sketch this week. I've used scraps of card and Pink Petticoat paper (no new trees were harmed in the making of this card). The digital image and sentiment are from The Alley Way.

I love fish. My Dad used to have tropical fish and I could watch them for hours - they are mesmerising - my favourites were those little neon coloured ones. So whilst we are in the fishy spirit here is a little funny:

A man started a new job at a zoo. He was given his first job by the zoo owner – to clean out the large tropical fish tank, which contained many exotic species.

While removing some gravel from the tank with his spade, he accidentally hit one of the fish and killed it. Worried about losing his job for this mistake, he decided to hide the evidence. He took the fish and fed it to the lions because lions eat anything.

The zoo owner did not notice the missing fish and gave the man a new job – to muck out the chimps. He was in the middle of mucking out when two of the chimps became a bit over familiar and, in an attempt to get them away the man lashed out with his spade, killing two chimps. In his panic he decided to hide the evidence and fed the unfortunate chimpanzees to the lions because lions eat anything.

The zoo owner was pleased with the man’s work and as his final task for the day he asked him to collect honey from the zoo’s beehives. The man tried hard to do this without upsetting the bees, but some got angry and stung him. He grabbed his spade and whirled it above his head, squashing and killing several dozen bees. Plagued with guilt, he fed these to the lions as well because lions eat anything.

The next day, a new lion arrived at the zoo. He enquired of the existing residents “what’s the food like here?” One of the zoo’s resident lions said, “Oh, it’s great. Only yesterday we had fish, chimps and mushy bees.”

I'm also entering my card into:

CAS-ual Fridays - Lime, Aqua and Navy
Lets Craft and Create - Scrap buster


Thanks for looking and have a great weekend!

Sew Sorry For Myself

My head hurts! I had too much vino calapso yesterday so it's definitely going to be a day of rest today. The theme over at LIM today is sewing.

I've made a handbag card with contrast hand stitching around the outside. The Radleyesque doggies have been cut using my Cricut.

Before I go to lie down in a darkened room I want to share with you an old Scottish recipe for fruit cake. You'll need the following: a cup of water, a cup of sugar, four large eggs, two cups of dried fruit, a teaspoon of baking soda, a teaspoon of salt, a cup of brown sugar, lemon juice, nuts, and a bottle of whisky.

Sample the whisky to check for quality.

Take a large bowl. Check the whisky again. To be sure it is the highest quality, pour one level cup and drink. Repeat. Turn on the electric mixer, beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl. Add one teaspoon of sugar and beat again.

Make sure the whisky is still okay. Cry another tup. Turn off the mixer. Break two leggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit. Mix on the turner. If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers pry it loose with a drewscriver.

Sample the whisky to check for tonsisticity. Next, sift two cups of salt. Or something. Who cares? Check the whisky. Now sift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one table. Spoon. Of sugar or something. Whatever you can find.

Grease the oven. Turn the cake tin to 350 degrees. Don't forget to beat off the turner. Throw the bowl out of the window, check the whisky again and go to bed.

Hic!

Thanks for looking and have a great weekend.

I Mustache You A Question...

My LIM entry this week represents my obsession with facial hair and the eradication thereof. This week the challenge is a one layer card with three of something on it.

I've paper pieced a moustache image three times with various papers from Summer Driggs Beautimous range. The sentiment is computer generated.

Is your morning beauty routine being overtaken by the search for those little blighters which pop up overnight? Every single one must go before you even start to think about your lotions and potions. Is this a fruitless and thankless task? Maybe I've got it all wrong - perhaps I should start a support group (The Hairy Marys) - hairy ladies unite and embrace those wayward follicles. As they say in Italy - donna barbuta, sempre piaciuta – everyone loves a woman with a beard.

Thanks for looking and have a great weekend!

Rain, Rain and More Rain

Will it ever stop raining? It's July - you know - SUMMER. June was a complete washout and it looks as though July is heading the same way.

Anyway, enough moaning, here is a little card for the following challenges:


A & T Digital Designs Challenge - Birthdays
Anything Goes Challenge - Polka Dot With A Birthday Theme
Digital Tuesday - Kids
Papertake Weekly - Anything Goes
Sassy Cheryl's - Anything Goes
Make it Monday - Anything Goes

I've used a Pink Petticoat Little Friends image which I've coloured, gone over with sparkly chalk, cut out and popped on dimensional pads. The number 4 has been hand cut from polka dot paper and outlined in black. The recipient's name has been computer generated.

Thanks for looking and have a great week.

Can You See What It Is Yet?

Over on LIM the challenge is to use the blog header as inspiration.

I've made an eye chart which I've mounted on kraft cardstock and again on black. In the words of Rolf Harris 'can you see what it is yet?'.

The eye chart represents my favourite challenge and my favourite word - FABULOUS!

And so onto a little funny:

Little Johnny’s neighbours had a baby boy. Unfortunately the baby, was born without ears. When the mother and new baby came home from the hospital, Johnny’s family was invited over to see the baby. Before they left their house, Little Johnny’s dad had a talk with him and explained that the baby had no ears. His dad also told him that if he so much as mentioned anything about the baby’s missing ears or even said the word “ears” he would get the spanking of his life when they came back home. Little Johnny told his dad he understood completely. When Johnny looked in the crib he said,” What a beautiful baby.” The mother said, “Why, thank you, Little Johnny.” Johnny said, “He has beautiful little feet and beautiful little hands, cute little nose and really beautiful eyes. Can he see?” “Yes, the mother replied, “we are so thankful. The doctor said he will have 20/20 vision ”

“That’s great,” said little Johnny, “coz he’d be outta-luck if he needed glasses.”

Thanks for looking and have a great weekend!

A Big Hat...

A quick one for the LIM challenge this week which is paper piecing.




The Stella image is from Bugaboo Stamps which is paper pieced with Pink Petticoat Big Dots paper. Inside the card reads:

Makes your bum look smaller!

Fashion advice brought
to you courtesy of
www.overthehill.com

I'm off to the milliners now - I wonder if they make hats in gigantic size?

Thanks for looking and have a great weekend.

A Cheeky Little Entry

Before going out today to brave the dismal Scottish elements I thought I'd sneak in another LIM entry this week.



The image is from My Favourite Things called Meet Me At The Cafe and is one of many things I had to have at the time but I don't think have ever used. I've paper pieced it with papers from Mel Stampz and my required shiny things are the little bracelets on the girls and Glossy Accents on their glasses of red.

Thanks for looking and have a great weekend!

Parliamo Glasgow : Lesson 1

I'm not sure if Scotland's other national drink, Irn-Bru, is advertised anywhere other than Scotland. I saw this ad on TV for the first time this week and couldn't stop laughing - till I was almost crying. But before I ask you to view this little ad - I need to give you a dictionary definition (Glasgow Slang Dictionary not the Oxford version) of the word fanny.

Fanny (noun) : a derogatory term to describe a person of low intelligence.

You are now qualified to watch the ad!



Genius! Whatever they are paying these advertising people it's not enough - the ads are a welcome break from the dross (football, football and more football) on TV at the moment.

Onto the LIM challenge this week which is themed 'Something Shiny'.





I've used a Pink Petticoat Best Fishes image and sentiment, the 'Sprightly' papers were a freebie from Two Peas In A Bucket, a little hand sewing and the shiny elements are a few gems for the bubbles.

Thanks for looking and have a great weekend.



Edited to add: I'm much more Earl Grey than Irn-Bru in case you were wondering!

Always Makes Me Giggle...

Here is today's little funny:

A duck goes into a furniture store and says 'got any duck food?'
The guy at the counter says, 'sorry, we don't sell duck food'.
The little duck walks out.
The next day, same duck, same guy. 'Got any duck food?'
'Sorry little duck, I told you yesterday, no duck food here.'
The duck walks out.
Next day, again, 'got any duck food?'
The guy says 'No! we don't sell duck food! and if you come in here again I'm gonna nail your feet to the floor!'
The duck walks out. next day, duck walks in. 'Got any nails?'
The guy says 'what?... no'.
'...got any duck food?'

Over on LIM this morning the challenge is one layer - use a flourish. I've used a flip flop image which I've digitally paper pieced with Pink Petticoat Lola Rose Flourish paper.




There's no chance of wearing flip flops here today - wellies will be more suitable I think.

Thanks for looking and have a great weekend.

Sweet Sundae

Over on CAS-ual Fridays the theme is to create a clean and simple project using polka dots - my favourite!



I've used a Sweet Sundaes image from Pink Petticoat which has been paper-pieced with papers from the same collection. I've also added Glossy Accents to the cherry and the name in the sentiment has been cut using my Cricut with glittery paper for use with cutting machines.

I'm also entering my card into:

Do You Stack Up? - Paper Piecing
Sassy Studio Designs - Use something wet
Paper Shelter Challenge - Going Dottie
Digital Tuesday - Anything Goes


Thanks for looking and have a great Friday.

Singing In The Reign

For my second LIM entry today here is a card for Her Majesty. I'm now on corresponding terms with Royalty don't you know!

The card has been made with Bugaboo's free Sock Elephant digital stamp and paperpieced with Pink Petticoat's free Diamond Jubilee Party Pack.

I'm also entering my card into:

Let's Craft & Create - One Layer


Thanks for looking and once again have a great extended jubilee weekend!

To Boldly Go...

...where no man has gone cold sore! I'm paying for all my sun worshipping last week - I have some lovely cold sores on my bottom lip. Never one to follow the crowd, I don't just have one, I've got a matching pair. I can never be accused of not accessorising now can I? Self imposed exile to Spinalonga is in order - or maybe I could just stick a jubilee tote over my head until it clears what do you think? Answers on a postcard please...

Onto this weeks LIM challenge of red, white and blue. I've used a Cre8tive Hands monster image which I've paperpieced and the chevron paper is from Mel Stampz.

And...wait...wait...wait... (fanfare) do do do, do do do, doodlee do, scream with excitement. I've been showCASed on LIM for my zebra carousel card from a couple of weeks ago. Chrissie and Mandi have finally given in to my not inconsiderable charms (taken pity more like - God loves a trier) and featured my little offering. Thank you, thank you, thank you... OK is that too much? Badge proudly displayed girls.

Before I go I would like to wish Her Maj' a very happy diamond jubilee - long may she reign over us. Thanks for looking and have a jubilicious weekend!

Let The Wind Blow High...

I've just come down from the Isle of Skye,
I’m no very big and I'm awful shy,
And the lassies shout when I go by,
" Donald where’s your troosers."

Let the wind blow high, let the wind blow low,
Through the streets in my kilt I'll go,
And all the lassies shout hello
Donald where's your troosers.

A Lassie took me to a ball
And it was slippery in the hall
And I was feart that I would fall
Fur I hadnae on ma' troosers

Let the wind blow high, let the wind blow low,
Through the streets in my kilt I'll go,
And all the lassies shout hello
Donald where's your troosers.

I went down to London Town
And I had some fun in the underground
The ladies turned their heads around
Saying "Donald where's your troosers".

Let the wind blow high, let the wind blow low,
Through the streets in my kilt I'll go,
And all the lassies shout hello
Donald where's your troosers.

To wear the kilt is my delight
It isna wrong, I know its right
The islanders would get a fright
If they saw me in the troosers

Let the wind blow high, let the wind blow low,
Through the streets in my kilt I'll go,
And all the lassies shout hello
Donald where's your troosers.

They'd like to wed me everywan
Just let them catch me if they can
You cannae tak’ the breeks aff a Hielan’ man
And I don't wear the troosers

Let the wind blow high, let the wind blow low,
Through the streets in my kilt I'll go,
And all the lassies shout hello
Donald where's your troosers.

For my LIM card this week I've made a 'sporran' shaped card to suit the recipe of not a square. I've cut a couple of pastille shapes and a crescent shape and stuck them all together. I've hand stitched around the pocket which is ideal for a gift card. The Sugar Nellie image (named Hamish, by the way, not Donald) is coloured with copics. Not my usual style but I quite like him. I'm sure Hamish's sporran is filled with the essentials for a 21st century man:

Lip balm - in case he gets lucky at the dancin'
Hair gel - not too much though - you don't want to look like you've been hit by an oil slick
A wee half bottle - have you seen the prices of drink at the dancin'? And that's before minimum pricing
A carefully folded five pound note - emergency bus fare home

Anyway that's enough for now. The sun has had its hat on all week in bonny Scotland - so much so in fact that I've had to have an operation to extract myself from my lounger to participate in the challenge this week - dedication or what?

I'm also entering Hamish into:

2 Sisters - Bring on the boys
Little Claire's - Male theme
One Stop Craft - For the Boys


Thanks for looking and have a great (hopefully sunshiney) weekend!

Hot News!

The very generous Liz has a lovely diamond jubilee freebie for you here - all in the usual funky Pink Petticoat style.

Thank you Liz!

Giddy Up

Now for my entry for the challenge today on LIM.

The carousel zebra image is from Sew Many Stamps. When I was little I loved the carousel horses at the fair - funnily enough that never ever translated into wanting a pony - I wonder why? I've paper pieced the canopy with DP from the Shabby Princess and flipped the image before cutting out twice so that the card is the same inside and out. Once I'd started cutting I soon regretted the idea - it was like scissor hokey cokey - in, out, in, out shake it all about.

I'm off to lunch soon with my mum so I need to start the facial painting and decorating. Thanks for looking and have a great weekend!

Somewhere Over The Rainbow

The challenge today on LIM is a card for a baby or child. My card this week goes a little bit further as the card was designed by a talented little girl by the name of Natalie Karolak aged 4. She gave me a drawing which I then turned into a card for her. So watch out all you crafters - there's a new kid on the block.

The rainbow came from Beyond The Fringe Crafts and the clouds were cut on my Cricut and then run through my Cuttlebug. I'll be back later hopefully with a design of my own. In the meantime thanks for looking.

It's The Way I Tell 'Em...

For my LIM One Layer using three stamps entry this week I've used a Squigglefly bouncing baby, the ladybird and sentiment are both from The Alley Way. I've put a shaded frame around my image to give the impression of dimension.

Here's a little joke today which appealed to my sense of humour (I hope it also appeals to my Welsh follower Faith).

On a beautiful summer's day, two American tourists were driving through Wales. At Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwyllllantysiliogogoch they stopped for lunch, and one of the tourists asked the waitress,

“Before we order, I wonder if you could settle an argument for us. Can you pronounce where we are, very, very, very slowly?”

The girl leaned over and said................“Burrrr Gurrrrr King."


That's all for today folks - the sun is shining - so I'm off to worship the big yellow ball in the sky.

Thanks for looking and have a great weekend!